April 30, 2018

Seen


Ever feel like you're not seen?
By your Father? Your friends? Even your own family?


You. Are. Seen. 
His eyes are for you and his eyes are on you. 

Let me expand a little bit. 

We can control what others see about us. For the most part. What you post on social media, what you share with your friends and family, how much of your crazy life you allow your co-workers to see. I could go on. You pretty much control what you conceal and what you reveal. And it feels pretty good to be in control of what others see about you, doesn't it? 

Until. That time when you reveal a little bit more of your heart and perhaps it's not seen. Maybe it's not seen at all or maybe it's not seen how you see it. Or. Let's flip the coin for a second- perhaps you are the one that doesn't see. Doesn't see what the Father is doing on your behalf. 

But here's the thing. You are seen. By your Maker. He knows everything about you. And he sees everything in you and surrounding you. Everything. 

I'm going to step out on a limb here and let you see a little bit of my own heart. 

A few of you know more details about my mom than I have time to share here. About our relationship. About her health. But here's what I will share- more than several days ago (I've needed some time to process the recent events) I was on my way home from spending most of the week in Knoxville. It wasn't the most pleasant of weeks. My grandmother was very sick and there was more tension than usual between my mom and I. On my drive home, my thoughts had plenty of time to wonder. To wonder from sadness to anger to doubt to fear. 

As though my Father needed my assistance, I reminded him of his most recent promises to me regarding the relationship with my mom and her health. You know why I reminded Him? Because my limited vision here on earth can't see all that he is doing in the heavenly's. Because for a moment I felt like I had been forgotten. My heartache wasn't seen. My cries weren't being heard. 

While the following days back at home were more than difficult knowing how things had been left in Knoxville, I had a choice. To wonder in my thoughts of doubt and fear and anger and sorrow or to rest in His peace. Peace knowing that my Father sees me. Sees my pain and feels my sorrow. Peace that while I may not know the outcome yet, He does. 

Amazing things happen when you can rest in that peace. Take a look at this picture. 



A lot of you know about my thing with hearts- a thing one of my friends shared with me that I grabbed ahold of several years ago. These hearts are my Father's way of reminding me that He sees me. He loves me and has not forgotten me. It's His kindness giving me something tangible to hold onto. 

See what is inside the heart? Susan. 
My. Mom. Is. In. The. Heart. 

And here's the thing about it- At first I did not see my mom's name. It was not until I was zooming in to crop it later that afternoon that I saw it. Get it? When we zoom our focus in on Him, we can see things we wouldn't normally see. During this time when I was not seeing, but yet I was choosing to believe, my Father gave me the sweetest reminder that he not only sees me and has me in His arms, but He sees my mom and has her too. 

He is too good to me. 

Will you do something with me? Lets turn our eyes up to heaven and see what happens when our eyes meet His. Lets see what He has to show us that maybe we aren't seeing down here on earth. 



April 13, 2018

Steady



steady
(adjective)- firmly fixed, supported, or balanced; not shaking or moving; regular, even, and continuous in development, frequency or intensity
(verb)- make or become steady; used as a warning to someone to keep calm or take care
I was having lunch with a friend the other day and we were having a nice time talking about life and what all the Lord has done and what he is still doing. I was telling her about my word for the year, steady. And we were talking about what that can mean. For me, I knew there was going to be a lot going on this year (my other word is activate) and instead of letting myself become burned out by tackling everything at once, I knew it was going to be critical for me to stay balanced as I pursue his calling on my life and all the things he has given me to do this year.  In other words- keep calm and keep marching on [even during the craziness of life].
She was sharing with me about how it can also mean that the Lord is steady. With me. With you. He is always by your side. Through all of the ups and downs of this life journey. And through life’s ups and downs, it is critical for us to stay in steady and constant relationship with him.
And then we were also talking about my tendency to lean toward performance and perfectionism. I have known I was a perfectionist for a long time, but I have been trying to decipher the difference between when it correlates with my God- given personality of attention to detail and when it is tied to my need for approval and acceptance. Yes- that’s it! It’s all about my motives. Am I truly doing my best for the Lord and only the Lord, or am I seeking the approval of others here on earth?
Remember the scripture, “Create a clean heart in me, O God. And renew a steadfast spirit in me”? Yeah that steadfast spirit? It can also be referred to as a right spirit. Loyal spirit. Faithful spirit.
So then all the dots started connecting…
As the Lord stays steadily by my side through all of life’s ups and downs and as I steadily stay in relationship with him and pursue his calling on my life, He will renew a steadfast spirit in me with pure motives only toward Him. A loyal spirit. A right spirit. A faithful spirit.
A spirit healed and free of performance for acceptance!
Yes and Amen. Thank you, Jesus!
Now, lets go ride those ups and downs of life together with that steadfast spirit!