May 3, 2010

Perfectly Placed and Then Washed Away


What an amazing weekend! I was able to spend time with friends, hang out with the fam, get a few things done around the house, and even take some time for myself. It makes for a good start to the week when I know I was able to invest some time in others and even work in some time for myself.

Part of my time this weekend was spent working in the flower bed with my little brother and sister. Us kids promised mom that we’d get the flower bed weeded and fixed up for her for Mother’s Day. Saturday morning Peyton Anne and I got up and went to the store to get some dirt. We came home and Russell helped us unload it from the car. We each had our own little area that we were working on. I was digging up the weeds and spreading the new dirt, Peyton Anne was trimming the bushes, and Russell was removing the old dirt and brush with the tractor. Note- In order for Russell to have any desire to help us with this project we have to find a way for him to use the tractor. Guys and their toys… Hehehe. By lunch time all of the dirt had been spread and the bushes were shaping up. Peyton Anne and I stepped back to admire our hard work and low and behold we look down at the bottom of the driveway only to see that Russell is tipping backward on the tractor. For a minute panic sets in, but quickly we run to his rescue. In all of his glee in playing with his big boy toy, he had backed the tractor too far off the edge of the driveway to dump the brush and it was tipping with him. We hollered for him to stop and he got off. After Russell was safe, we all stepped back to determine the best way to solve the problem. Russell determined that it would be best to pull it out with another tractor we had. In the end, we all ended up safe and the tractors were safely put away. All in perfect timing for the rain to set in for the rest of the day. We moved inside to do some house work and ended the evening having dinner with our grandmother. What a nice Saturday!

Sunday was even better! Spent Sunday morning in a wonderful sermon by Brother Doug and had one of my favorite spring/summer lunches (bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich) at home. After the parents arrived home that afternoon, we again admired our hard work in the flower bed with them. The afternoon was spent making some delicious brownies and then off to the mall with the sister for some retail therapy (window shopping therapy of course). The evening concluded with a nice hot bubble bath and suddenly I felt ready to conquer the week that lied ahead of me.

Monday morning came all too soon, but I got up refreshed and ready to conquer the day. Only to see when I walked out the door and down the sidewalk that the flower bed we had worked so diligently on just a few days before was washing away from the downpour of rain the night before. The new dirt that had been so perfectly placed in the flowerbed had now been washed onto the sidewalk. I suddenly felt a rush of disappointment fall over me. The good feeling of working so hard with my siblings to get the flowerbed set up just perfectly for our mom was gone in just a matter of seconds.

Just as suddenly as I felt that disappointment, I had a visual of how disappointed and saddened my Heavenly Father must feel at times with me. How often does He so perfectly plan and place things in my life that I all too frequently wash away and destroy it in just a matter of minutes? It was then I remembered that my Father has feelings too- feelings toward me that I can’t even begin to comprehend. Someone I know put it in perspective for me around Easter time. She said that she wanted to think of the crucifixion story differently this year. She wanted to be able “feel it and believe it like it happened to someone I know.” What? Jesus is someone we know… But she said she does not think of Him like she does her boyfriend. If her boyfriend had to endure what Christ endured on the cross for us then she would be devastated. Jesus longs for us to feel this way! It is His heart’s desire for us to desire Him as much as He desires us. I think about it like this: I get up in the mornings and usually get ready in the bathroom with my sister. We often talk about the day’s events that will take place or what happened the day before. We fellowship and communicate with each other before we go our separate ways for the day. How would she feel and for that matter, how would I feel if we did not talk in the mornings? She would probably be saddened or upset if I didn’t talk to her and I wouldn’t feel so great about it either. Jesus is the same way. He longs to have that conversation with me each and every day. And the difference with Him is that He does go with me everywhere, unlike my family and friends. So there should be no excuse for me not to have that conversation with Him throughout the day. I don’t want to wash away any of those opportunities that He has so perfectly placed in front of me anymore. I’m not going to say that it won’t ever happen again, but I’m sure going to try and do it less frequently because I know how that disappointment feels and I sure don’t want Him to feel that way.

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